Reading, Watching, Listening (August 2024)
/As always, I took most of the summer off to travel with our family. Hence, giving me plenty of time to relax and read.
READING
(1) Cocktail Hour Under the Tree of Forgetfulness - Last Reading, Watching, Listening post I recommended Alexandra Fuller’s memoir - Don’t Let’s Go to the Dogs Tonight - about her childhood growing up on a farm in Rhodesia. Fuller’s mom hated that book. So Fuller decided to tell the same story through a different lens, by interviewing her parents. When put together the two books offer a fascinating portrait of “truth.” Whereas Fuller’s first memoir made her parents seem irresponsible (though still loving), Cocktail Hour Under the Tree of Forgetfulness tells a different story of love, poverty, forbearance, and mental illness. Honestly, it’s so hard to be a good parent. I’m nervous to think what my own children will write about me.
(2) Swimming in Paris: A Life in Three Stories - French author Colombe Schneck’s three essays about abortion, friendship/loss, and love make for pretty powerful reading. As summarized by Amazon, “In Seventeen, Friendship, and Swimming, Colombe Schneck orchestrates a coming-of-age in three movements. Beautiful, masterfully controlled, yet filled with pathos, they invite the reader into a decades-long evolution of sexuality, bodily autonomy, friendship, and loss.”
(3) Big Swiss - This novel is sort of bizarre, but incredibly well-written (and funny!). A woman who seems sort of lost in live (to put it mildly) moves into a bee-filled decaying mansion and finds work transcribing sessions for a therapist. And then she becomes obsessed with one of the therapist’s clients. But really it’s the writing that makes this book hard to put down.
(4) Blue Ruin - Blue Ruin is the third book in Hari Kunzru’s three colors trilogy, all of which are loosely united in their exploration of issues involving art and race. This novel centers around a visual and performance artist who, during covid, ends up at the house his ex-girlfriend is staying in and has to deal with his past. Ugh. That makes it sound boring. And it’s not boring. Though I’m not sure how I felt about this book. Several of the characters seem like caricatures - a narcissistic art dealer obsessed with clean eating, a semi-famous “tortured” artist who throws tantrums and cheats on his wife, and the narrator himself, an “off the grid” loner who eschews capitalism. But by presenting all these dichotomies between the two main characters, Kunzru seems to have something to ask (though perhaps not answer) about how best to live a life.
(5) Sandwich - Ugh - I really wanted to like this novel, but I kind of hated it. Sandwich is about a summer vacation the narrator and her husband take with their 20-something kids and her parents. The title refers to both the fact that the narrator is always making everyone sandwiches and that she is sandwiched between the older and younger generation. As a mother of teenagers who loves family vacations, I couldn’t wait to read it. But the whole book is so saccharine, nobody ever really fights or even makes fun of each other. Nobody even complains when seven people have to share a bathroom and co-exist in a ONE BEDROOM COTTAGE. The narrator routinely talks about how absolutely perfect her children are. Maybe the book just made me feel bad about my own failings (as a mother, as a caregiver, as a human being), but I found it unrelatable. Have you ever been stuck in a conversation with someone who just wants to spend hours talking about their AMAZING children? That’s what it felt like to read this novel.
(6) All Fours - NY Times called this the “first great perimenopause novel”, so I was almost scared to read it for fear of disappointment (what if I hated it?). And it is a quirky read - the narrator - who is a wife and mother - attempts to drive cross country by herself, but is waylaid a few hours into the start of the trip as she begins an emotional affair with a much younger man she meets while he’s washing her windshield. As far as books go, this is the direct opposite of Sandwich in almost every way (my guess is that if you like one, you won’t like the other). It’s raw and somewhat selfish, I can’t say I agreed with all of the narrator’s choices, but I really admired her quest to figure out, on her own terms, what she wants and needs from life.
(7) White Tears - Similar to Blue Ruin, White Tears is part of Hari Kunzru’s three colors trilogy (I still need to read the red book). In White Tears, the narrator and his rich friend become obsessed with vintage blues albums. From there, things become pretty surreal. Whereas Blue Ruin skirts around issues of race and class, this book confronts them straight on. According to Amazon, “White Tears is a ghost story, a terrifying murder mystery, a timely meditation on race, and a love letter to all the forgotten geniuses of American music and Delta Mississippi Blues.” At times I thought this book dragged a little, but then another plot twist would occur (so. many. plot. twists.) and I couldn’t wait to see what happened.
WATCHING
(1 ) Thelma (in theaters) - I learned about Thelma - a movie about a grandmother who gets scammed and goes on a Mission Impossible style adventure to get her money back - on Pop Culture Happy Hour and immediately NEEDED to see it. Thelma is funny and charming without being ridiculous (there’s a scooter and hearing aids and even a gun heist). And it humanizes old people in a way I’ve never seen before (as Thelma says, “we all have our good days and our bad days.”). I didn’t get along with my own mother, but watching this movie made me actually miss her a little, I think it’s one of the few things we could have enjoyed watching together.
The film currently has a well-deserved 99% on Rotton Tomatoes and I highly suggest seeing it with multiple generations.
(2) The Fall Guy (paid on Amazon) - I’m so shocked this movie - where Ryan Gosling plays a stuntman with Emily Blunt as his love interest - didn’t do better in the theaters. It’s such a fun, easy watch. Especially as a family. Sort of campy, but never boring.
(3) Such Brave Girls, Season 1 (Hulu) - Has anyone else watched this English comedy about a single mom and her two grown daughters? I feel like Hulu hid it. It’s rough (NOT a family show) and absolutely hilarious. I found the mom oddly relatable and then hated myself for feeling that way. Anyways, it’s sort of hard to watch at times as everyone makes every bad decision they can possibly make. But still, I sort of loved them all.
(4) Civil War (paid on Amazon) - A movie about an imaginary (yet ambiguous) American Civil War staring Kirsten Dunst as a PHOTOJOURNALIST! And about the ethics involving such things? Does it get any better? Thank you A24!
(5) The Stepford Wives (2004 version) (Amazon). I randomly came across this movie while editing and looking for something to watch in the background and figured “why not?” One of my dad’s favorite authors was Ira Levine and I’m always surprised that he has almost no name recognition, whereas his novels have become well known in the culture zeitgeist (Stepford Wives, Rosemary’s Baby, Boys from Brazil). I have some major qualms with this movie (though, admittedly I haven’ read the book in over 25 years), as Nicole Kidman’s character is so unlikable that you almost prefer her as Stepford wife. But still, in an age when society is pushing everyone women towards Ozempic and Zoloft (no shame) and when #tradwife is on the rise it’s hard not to see this movie through a new culture lens and wonder, is this what’s happening to all of us? It it real?
On a similar note - check out the Secrets of Miss America documentary on Hulu (esp. episode 2 and the conversations regarding whether or not to keep the swimsuit competition - fascinating) AND Nettflix’s Dallas Cheerleaders documentary (seriously, how much money does the franchise make off of these basically unpaid extremely talented women?)
(6) Hacks, Season 3 (Max) - I thought this show - about the relationship between an older female comedian and her much younger writer - would run out of material after a few seasons, but instead it keeps getting better. Also, much like Thelma, I like how it tries to bridge the gap across generations. I esp. loved the lost in the woods episode.
(7) Inside Out 2 (still in theaters) - So Riley’s finally hit puberty and, hence, a whole new wave of emotions/characters appears - embarrassment, anxiety, envy and (best of all) ennui. And, of course, the “old” emotions and the “new” emotions DO NOT get along. (so relatable!). This was a little slower and less pretty than the first film, but there were still lots of great moments. My favorite was the huge crevasse known as sar - chasm (hah!!).
LISTENING
(1) Charli XCX, Brat - This album is nothing like my usual listening (one of the best songs is called “Club Classics” and I don’t even dance), but it’s oddly catchy. And a great mix of dance tunes with some deeper lyrics. But mostly it is fun. And, well, it’s a “Brat” summer - so we all might as well get on board.
(2) Chappell Roan, The Rise and Fall of a Midwest Princess- I know. I know. Everyone, regardless of age, gender, or sexual orientation is jumping on the Chappell Roan bandwagon. So I feel a little generic. But I don’t care as every song really is just so catchy and fun.
(3) Popculture Happy Hour - I know I’m late to the game here, but I just started listening to this long running podcast. I love that their movie reviews are both funny and relatable.
(4) Zach Byran, The Great American Bar Scene- As I mentioned last post, I’m obsessed with Zach Bryan. His lyrics make me randomly out-of-the-middle-of-nowhere cry. It’s weird. Have you heard Bass Boat? It’s like the whole experience of life - from every angle - contained in a single song. Or Pink Skies? Or Memphis? Basically, just listen to the album. If something doesn’t make you cry, then I don’t know what else I can recommend, as we might not understand each other.
(5) Iron and Wine, Light Verse - I’m not sure why I have this on constant repeat, but I do. I love the melancholy feel combined with the great lyrics.
(6) The Hold Steady, Boys and Girls in America - I don’t know much about the Hold Steady but several of Dan’s friends love them, so we went to see them live at the Atlantis a few weeks ago (love that venue). There’s something sort of empowering about a balding, nerdy looking rock star singing about drugs and sex. But then the venue was full of middle age men trying to start a mosh pit, which seemed dangerous (someone could break a hip!) and unnecessary. All that being said, I sort of loved the concert. Yay for trying new things!
(7) I Saw the TV Glow soundtrack - Did anyone else see this movie? I can’t decide what I thought, but I also can’t stop thinking about it (which is usually a good thing). Anyways, the soundtrack goes along with it so well. And I was happily surprised to see the guest appearance by Phoebe Bridgers.
WHAT ABOUT EVERYONE ELSE? ANY GOOD RECOMMENDATIONS?
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Darcy Troutman Photography is a Northern VA/Washington DC/Maryland documentary-style family photographer, who believes in capturing real moments. Interested in learning more? Please click here to sign up for my newsletter or schedule a session.